Just Go

Pressing the reset button on my life was without a doubt the best decision I ever made! It’s been 3 weeks in the city and if I didn’t have a calendar or watch I’d say it’s been 3 months. NY feels like home. So much so that we already have a love/hate relationship. She’s my new disgusting haven. (Side note: What’s up with people here not covering their mouth when they sneeze. Uh, not cool.)

I love the randomness about New York. My new Saturday ritual consists of venturing out to a place I’ve never been. And as you can imagine, I have my options! Yesterday a thrift store quest landed me in Brooklyn Heights and I stumbled upon one of the most breathtaking views of Manhattan along with the most amazing pizza of my life. You see, thanks to my trusty iPhone I can get as lost as I want and find the quickest route back home within a matter of seconds.

I guess I’m getting high off not knowing what’s coming next. One day I can be home all by myself on a Friday night with nothing to do but dance in my pajamas (Charlie Wilson is the man)! And the next day I can be at a photo shoot for my new client (you all HAVE to check out Shanel Cooper-Sykes). And to top off the week I could end up Chicago-stepping at a fabulous barbecue in Harlem. Maybe I should change my name to Russell Stover’s. Get it? Box of chocolates. Ok I’m laughing all by myself.

Nevertheless, I’m here with an open heart and open mind and am loving every second of it. My new motto is ‘Just Go’. Go far, go high, go deep, go wide. And if you’re not going to go hard then go home.

Call Me Crazy

Exactly one year ago yesterday I decided to move to New York based upon a vision God placed in my heart. I don’t know if I’m the only one that’s lived a quarter life crisis but last year, while most of my peers were building on their lives, mine seemed like it was falling apart. I had a broken heart, I felt no type of fulfillment in my work, and my life overall just didn’t feel like the life I was created to live. So I cried out to God and asked him to open some door in what seemed like this dead end pit I was in and He gave me a vision of me living in New York and prospering in a publishing career. Instantly I knew that was for me. I didn’t know how I would get there but I knew I would. A year later I still don’t have the exact plan worked out but I have an apartment and a one-way ticket.

With much prayer, consideration and preparation over the past year I still feel this is the right decision for me, however risky and scary it may be. There’s nothing but an impulse, or should I say the ‘inner pulse’ of my heart driving me to NYC. No man, no job, no school. No promise, no guarantee. No blueprint for how this is all going to work out. And call me crazy but I’m moving forward anyway. Dr. King said faith is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase and that is exactly what I am doing.

I’ve gotten many pats on the back for my perceived bravado, and have been equally ridiculed for my supposed naivety. Nothing new is happening under the sun, hence I don’t take words of sound advice lightly. However, this is my life…my ONE life to live and I cannot live it in fear of the unknown nor refuse the call of my inner voice. Therefore I am going to New York, trembling with trepidation, squinting in a fog, not knowing what’s coming next.

The one thing I do know is that there is no failure in following your heart. I strongly believe that God honors truth and if you misstep with a genuine heart he will guide your feet to the place where they need to be. Lord may you know my heart, may you guide my feet.

Restless Wanderer

Oh you restless wanderer, all your efforts are for your mouth yet your appetite will never be satisfied. Searching endlessly for a land with rain from heaven. Confined to that which you know and removed from what you have yet to seek. Asleep to your definition, oblivious to your dimensions and hidden from the truth. A lifetime you have been sentenced to restlessly wander this earth, oh you restless wanderer.

Oh you restless wanderer, my heart cries out for you know not what you do. To you darkness IS light and death IS life. You have yet to learn that a kernel of wheat must fall into the ground and die for it to produce much grain. I pray for you, oh you restless wanderer. Be made known the path of life. Be filled with joy and eternal pleasures.

Affectionate Giving

Do nice gestures convey affection? For example, if a man of means treats a woman to something nice does that mean he really likes her? Are you special to someone because they choose to spend some of their free time with you? Is there anything impressive about giving up spare dollar bills as the buckets roll around on Sunday? I mean these are all nice gestures but I don’t know if they reveal any true sentiment. To me there’s nothing extra romantic or sensational about throwing out leftovers and spare change, but hey that’s just me.

What about giving something held a little more near and dear to our hearts? Something that makes us cringe a little when we think about giving it up. Now that's romantic! Giving something cherished can be a beautiful act of affection. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Many of us are in love and want to give our hearts to that special someone. We may not be able to give our hearts literally, but we can give of ourselves in sharing something of value. When you give that which you love to a person, you’re actually sharing a piece of yourself and engaging in true intimacy (in-to-me-see).

So the next time you want to show affection consider giving something. And not just any something, but something cherished.

Life is in the Moment

I know it sounds really cliché but it’s true. Life is in the moment. Not yesterday and not tomorrow but right now. So often we look back on the past and wish we could relive a moment that’s already passed us. And if you’re like me, you look to the future and wish you were living in a moment that’s yet to come. But what about the present? It shouldn’t be spent pining over moments that will quickly come and go or memories that can’t be relived. Life is in today, right now. And we should embrace the present.

Defined

To be defined began as a destination at which laid my signature design. Defined became a life journey in which I’ve enlisted. Susan Taylor said the search for our selves is our life’s purpose. I believe this with all my heart. I believe my definition was defined since the beginning of time and it’s that definition I seek to fulfill rather than create. Join me.

Cowards and Zombies

With Halloween right around the corner, many of us will have no need to shop for a costume. In fact we’re already wearing them, trick or treating through life as cowards and zombies. Bearing the façade of life. Truth be told, most of us merely exist to survive. We drift through this journey lacking a fierce intent to create life on every end.

Whatever happened to living life with creativity and boldness? Did that ever exist? When did we start doing things like staying true to dead relationships and unfulfilling career paths ‘just because’? When did it become acceptable to not turn the tides of our lives when we start drifting towards barren lands and dry desserts?

We’ve hidden behind our comfort zones for far too long. It’s time to face the unknown. To adventure through life and discover new paths and unchartered territory. Let’s take control of our fate. Somewhere along the road we stopped dreaming, stopped imagining, and stopped creating. Let’s take off these costumes. We’ve been cowards and zombies too many damn years in a row.